Nze Uche Ezechukwu asked a question on his wall regarding Nigerian men who murder their wives in America.
It can only get worse. With what I see here among African husbands and their wives? It can only get worse.
Now, let me tell you what the problem is
1. An African man living abroad is looking for a wife, the first thing he does is tell his people to get him a nurse. If he fails to get a nurse, he tells the lady that she has to get into the nursing field once she gets to the USA, Canada, or UK. And so the woman gets in, fees possibly paid by the lazy boss who hopes to have a very efficient ATM later. Upon graduation, the bobo transfers every of his responsibility to the ATM, giving up his place as father and husband. The woman works like a donkey while the man now sits in front of TV or video game.
You gave up your place. You turned her to a man; sir, don’t expect to have a wife in your home. You can’t eat your cake and have it.
2. And you, African woman, a man asked for your hand in marriage and the first thing he wants to know is if you are a nurse or ready to study nursing. You shamelessly accepted the marriage. Is that love? You were not even given the right to choose your career, at your age, a fellow human chose your career. I admire nurses who are in it because from childhood, that’s what they want to become. But when I see that you have no passion in you and you are telling me that you are a nurse, I instantly place you where I place your likes. Your c
You have to live with the consequences of your choice. You can’t eat your cake and have it.
3. You are an African woman who wants to be more westernized than westerners. You now feel too big to cook and even when you cook the thing you call food, all he gets is “hi, your food is in the microwave”. You feel he has to be forced, not begged and pampered to do laundry and help clean up. You do all these because you are looking at irresponsible Americans and not those with good upbringing. Look at those from responsible homes and you would get to understand that there is a place for the man in every home. You would get to see that white or black, young or old, every man has that male ego in him and it takes wisdom to get him to do things without struggle.
4. You may need to change your friends. Those your friends who party with you every weekend without their husbands. You work all week, your children don’t see you and weekend when you should face your home, you are out there partying and drinking and doing all sorts of rubbish with your friends. And I don’t know when Igbo women started going crazy for all these asoebi nonsense. Woman, sit your butt at home and run your home.
Change your friends. Change those women who are nothing but miserable comforters, whose counsel is anti-God/nature.
Sir, you have to stop being lazy, you are not in America to hang out with friends while the woman feeds and provides shelter. It is your duty to feed, clothe, and provide shelter. She can only assist, it’s not her duty. If you make her a man, don’t expect to have a wife.
Above all, let us return to the Lord and He will return to us.
May God bless men like my husband who is holding on to our values in a foreign land.
Source : Culled From Amara Van-Lare : Love, Relationship and Life Counseling Online
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